Lets start with a story then understand the concept..
There was a couple travelling in a bus to their house, situated near the himalayas. The roads in the Himalayas are very dangerous and when it comes to driving of our Indian drivers, it makes it even more more dangerous. Usually they are drunk and drive on hazardous roads.
Now this couple had two routes ,say first route and second route , to travel to their home , both of which were usual bus routes. One was a bit longer than the other. So ofcourse they preferred to use the shorter route(the second route).
This time they were returning home from work both were engaged in conversing about the whole day. Wife suddenly said, "Lets get down on the first way and walk till our house". Husband was tired after the days' work but reluctantly agreed to his wife.
They asked the conductor to stop the bus, got down. Wife immediately realized she left something in the bus and went inside to get it. It took about 5 mins for the bus to leave that place..
Suddenly, they heard something falling , looking at it the wife was happy and thanking God. They saw that the bus moved ahead a few meters and big boulder fell on it from the mountains. The stone crushed the bus. There was no chance that person could have survived . Wife was still thanking God for saving her life and her husband's life.
On the other hand, when she saw her husband she was shocked. He was crying. He was devastated, dejected, cursed himself. Wife asked, "our lifes are saved , why are you behaving this way, we would have died if i would not have said to get down here".
Husband said " yes you saved our lives, but because of us those people in the bus died. If we wouldn't have stopped the bus over here and if you had not wasted 5 mins which we took to get down. The bus would have passed this place, that stone would not have fallen on the bus. Many life a could have been saved not only ours".
Here wife is correct husband is also correct.
Sometimes we look to think which may be positive from our point of view but it can be very negative in reality. Rather we can say husband is also correct and wife is also correct. Who is wrong then?
Wife understood something from this situation and she expressed it. Husband understood something more from the situation and he expressed it. The situation which they saw were same but they gave different views which is bound to happen in every situation of life. A selfish person will see his life saved and a selfless person will see others lives saved. Both have their opinion, they are correct in there point of view.
But here comes the trap. The situation which they saw was same but understand of the situation was very different. This difference in opinion could be seen at every phase. Here Many times situations are not so easy to understand . In those situations if, WIFE REJECTS THE OPINION OF HER HUSBAND AND SAYS I M CORRECT AND HUSBAND REJECTS HIS WIFE SAYING HE IS CORRECT.. THIS WILL GIVE RISE TO CONFLICTS IN THEIR LIFE.
Everytime, when there is a conflict in relationships , same thing happens , both are correct but we never pay emphasis upon the point of view of other. If we start to look at things from others perspective there would be no fight. It will make us understand the second person is equally right as the first person .
WHAT WE DO?
We enforce our view on others, we force our understanding on others, we don't let the other person express. If at all we let them, we don't look into the matter through their eyes. We still enforce our thinking on them.
WHAT TO DO?
We need to understand other people's concepts, their view, their perspective. When we do that we will realize we might be right but other one is equally right. When we understand this ,there wont be any reason to fight.
If i am right , you are right then why this fight..
There won't be a fight.. Think..
Written by :- KETAN BHARUKA
Edited by :- VINEETH ABRAHAM